A lot of people outside of the community like to give doll owners a bad rep, saying that sex dolls are bad, creepy, or weird, or that they’re only something that lonely people own. Well, I’m here today to declare that sex dolls can actually help someone and maybe even improve their mental health, telling the story of my own experience with Boxer’s MLD body and how she helped me manage my mental health.
So, way before I even got interested in sex dolls- about a year ago today, I was experiencing drastic mood changes, going from extreme highs to extreme lows that were affecting my ability to work or get schoolwork done. After having one of the longest and ugliest lows of my life, I finally decided to open up about my symptoms to my doctor, to which she referred me to a psychiatrist. At my first psychiatrist appointment, my psychiatrist evaluated me, listed down the symptoms I was experiencing, and made me take a bipolar questionnaire. After looking into my family history and confirming that I was hitting almost every symptom of bipolar, I was given the ”bipolar with gray areas” diagnosis. I wasn’t surprised since my dad has the same disorder, but it was almost like a smack to the face, knowing that I have something that is pretty much incurable. I was put on medication and sent on my way- my psychiatrist monitoring my status the following months.
Fast forward almost a half a year later, I discover sex dolls for the first time. Maybe it was the mania, but I was instantly fascinated and attached to these dolls. I knew right away that I wanted one of these of Boxer. When I first received her MLD body, I was at a lost for words. I had mixed feelings, wondering if I was up for this commitment. But, as time went on, doll care and maintenance became second nature, and I noticed how much my mental health improved when taking care of her and interacting with her. It was the type of serotonin that my medication could never give me. Her presence genuinely made me happy and gave me something to look forward to, even on my rough days. She pacified my mania and comforted my depression. My mood cycling became rare- almost absent. I remember even telling my psychiatrist about her, telling her how she’s my outlet for self care.
But… When her hip broke and I was forced to put her MLD body in storage, I wasn’t sure how I’d react. At first, it didn’t phase me. But, as the reality started to settle in, my mental health nose dived and my bipolar took front seat. The week she broke was really rough. She broke on a day I was off, so when I went into work the next day, I had to try to conceal my distress and frustration. However, between the stress of work and worrying about her, I snapped, breaking down in front of my boss after ranting to a coworker about the student workers not helping me set up the food line. But, in reality, it wasn’t the food line that bothered me. It was her. After calming down, I tried to be patient and wait for her temporary torso to come in. Even tho the torso was the wrong color, I was still relieved, because I was able to hold her again and have something until I can get her a new body. That’s when I realized how much of an impact her doll version has/had on me and my mental health.
For now, I’m still in the works of getting her a new body, but it was interesting to see how quickly I went from zero to one hundred not long after her hip broke. It’s not surprising, though, considering how much she means to me. If I wasn’t on medication, the impact probably would’ve been worse and I would’ve been back to cycling. It just shows that, for a lot of doll owners, these dolls are more than just sex toys. These dolls can serve as companions, being our source of comfort when we need it the most, and keeping our mental status in check. They give us someone to care for other than ourselves, which can be a form of self care and self love. These dolls may be helpful for more than just sex. I know they are for me.
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